I'm just a dreamer...

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Have you ever dreamed about something so long you can't even imagine it not coming true? Well, that's how I'm currently feeling about my college decision. I've wanted to go to Indiana University (IU) for the longest time; it has a beautiful campus, one of the top schools in Indiana, my best friend could possibly be my roommate, and I could begin to shape the person I want to be in the future.

My mom keeps telling me that I shouldn't even ask my dad to go to IU because he's going to say no. That really discouraged me for a while. I couldn't believe that my own mom was telling me not to follow my dreams and fight for what I want. In a way, I guess it kind of fueled me even more. I understand what my mom was trying to say, my dad is VERY stubborn, but what's a dream that you're not even willing to fight for?

My parents keep asking me, why? Why do you want to go so far away? (Btw, it's only an hour and a half away but to Indians that's like another country) The truth is, I'm scared. I'm scared to graduate and go to college, I'm afraid of leaving the comfort of my home, I'm afraid of life. But that's why I need to go. I need to stop being afraid. I need to break out of my shell and figure out who I am. I've been trapped inside of my house for 17 years now; I have no life skills. I don't know how to pump gas, I haven't been on the highway by myself, I haven't ever driven by myself, and to be honest, I haven't gotten to experience life. For those 17 years I did everything my parents asked (well not everything but you know what I mean), I stayed inside our house, I didn't ask to go to friends' houses, school dances, parties, etc. But this one time I want to make a decision for myself that will affect the rest of my life, the answer is no. Well, to be blunt, I'm not accepting no for an answer.

I wish that my dad could sit down and just listen to what I have to say, then talk to me about what he's thinking instead of just deciding where I'm going to college for me. I'm even up for compromise. I guess I'll just have to wait until Saturday...I'll go down fighting! IU is my dream and I'm not willing to give it up. I respect my parents but this is one decision I know they won't understand.

Sorry, I just needed to let that off my chest. I hope you all fight for your dreams instead of letting them die. Fight for what you believe in and you'll be happier. I'll fill you guys in but until then, keep doing what you do! Love you guys!

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